Doing doing doing

I was just reading a story an author had written about how much he tried, how hard he worked, and how unfairly he was treated. This is not an uncommon story, but what struck me was this: everything he wrote about was external to himself and his own attitudes. Those around him weren't getting the effort he'd put in. Circumstances weren't arranging themselves the way he hoped. One person couldn't get over their obvious resistance to his suggestions.

I saw this as so much effort being thrown against a mirror. The figures in the mirror aren't going to change their actions until the person reflected there makes a change.

Remember you're seeing reflections and projections today. What could change for you?

Open for presence

It's a mystery to me why some days have a kind of squeezed feeling, as though no matter how many things I cross off my list, there will always be more. It will never be enough. I will always feel I'm "winging it," never feeling solid, sure, rooted.

And then other days things flow easily. Energy leads, God feels like everything and everywhere. Peace and security reign. What makes the difference? My diet? My list? My surroundings? Solar flares?

Which is the real me? I know the answer to that: it is the part of me that is not separate, could never be separate, will not ever for a single moment in my life be separate from God. My soul knows that. Oh my mind, if you're in fact separate from my soul (but how can you be?), would you please try to remember too? <3 p="">

Blessing the all

Precious God, Lord of all life, Lover of all creation, thank you for being present in every moment, every cell, every ray of light, every smile, every tear. Help us feel you in the space between our bodies, in the gaps of our understanding, in the place where no answers can be found, and in the unexpressed yearnings and doubts and confusions of our hearts and minds. You alone know the work of our souls, being knit together again in you. You love and bless and guide our work, day by day. May we see it. May we know it. May we rest in it. Amen.

A prayer for the morning

Oh loving and precious Lord, who in the night spreads freshness over all the earth, please breathe your love easily to all who need it this morning. To those who struggle in the Phillipines, give your tender and protecting and guiding hand. To those fearful of the coming winter, help them feel a sense of "enoughness" and your constant, never-failing provision. To those facing the day alone, O God, be a loving companion and Guide, and to those who labor through the day without a sense of your divine holding, come alongside, O Lord, whisper in their ears, touch their hearts, that their spirits may be lifted and they may catch a gentle sense of the infinite Love and Care that is pouring out to them, even now and in every moment. Amen.

Thank you, God

For a peaceful day * that my cold is GONE! * that the dogs are happy * that my mom is feeling better (and close) * for good energy * for tulips, just one inch tall so far * for the green twigs on the bush * for birdsong in the morning * for generosity everywhere * for the way opening for my son * for the great people I work with * for compassion pouring out from my heart * for compassion pouring out toward me * for a home I love * for Joseph * for answers to prayer * for answers when I didn't pray * for curiosity * for creativity *  for everything that happened today * for fun dreams last night * for a good night's sleep (okay, that one is in anticipation). Goodnight, God. Love you.

Resistance to change

I was surprised to find that what bubbled up this morning for me during my meditation time was a big heavy block of resistance to change. By actually letting the sweet thread of a past memory wind through my thoughts, I experienced all the warmth and comfort that event brought. And right at the end of that feeling, I also got a big dose of protective energy--this is why I need to keep my life the way it is, the thought said.

Ah, yes. Protection. Safety. Peace.

There's something to be said for a life you know, a life you created and constructed, a life you love.

But sometimes the process of growth calls us to new things. Doesn't it feel like such a risk to open to the possibility that things can change? What if changing brings loss? (and doesn't it always, in some sense, ultimately?) What if I'm less happy after allowing change in than I am right now? Couldn't I just go on as things are, balanced, peaceful, and calm?

I don't believe that change has to be like Mount Vesuvius erupting. I think change can happen beautifully and with joy, like ice melting in warm sunshine. And yet I see that the way I've constructed and safeguarded my current reality, I see change as a threat to the existing order and not as the welcome fresh breezes of spring.

That will be my ongoing meditation today, and a prayer for you, too, if you're in the same place. That we may smile at change as a friend, come to add even more blessing and love and beauty to our lives. And so it is. Amen.

Let Us See What Love Has Done

Several weeks ago, sitting in silent worship at Indianapolis First Friends Meeting, I kept hearing the phrase, "Let us see what love will do," bubbling up over and over again from my heart. I accepted this as a gift of spirit and opened my eyes, looking in love around the beautiful, simple sanctuary. I saw bowed heads. Let us see what love will do. I saw the choir. Let us see what love will do. I saw families in front of me. Let us see what love will do.

I felt full of this loving mantra, a reminder to be here, right now, in the present moment, witnessing the movement of Love and its blessing.

When I told my wonderful Writing as Ministry class at Earlham School of Religion about my experience the following Tuesday night, they quickly pointed out that this was a phrase of William Penn's, the first governor of Pennsylvania and a weighty Friend: "Let us then try what love will do." Whether I was channeling William Penn or hearing the fresh voice of Love arising in the silence, that beautiful phrase has stayed with me in the weeks since.

Here at the end the year, I find myself reflecting on the movement of Love throughout my 2012. Yes, we have had challenges and tragedies--some of them unthinkable. Yes, we have had setbacks and frustrations: some of them carried out by those elected to represent us. But are we ending the year with more Love than we began it? Has Love carried us through the weeks, smiled in the face of challenge, and graced our lives when we didn't expect--or deserve--it?

My reflection here at the end of 2012 is about noticing how Love has been at work in my life these past 12 months. Are my relationships at peace? Is there creativity in my life? Do I feel close to God--close enough to smile and say thank you, and close enough to throw the occasional temper tantrum? (I believe God understands and actually enjoys those.)

As we end this year so full of blessing and heartbreak, let's stop for a minute and consider the moments Love changed everything. And let's hope--and watch--together for more of those moments in 2013.

Peace, beloveds. And Happy New Year. :)